because

you can't rely on anyone but yourself. People you love and know to their core and trust will disappoint you, lie to you, hurt you, steal from you, betray you. That is a lesson I have learned from every member of my family at one point or another. Every single one. So why add another life to the chain of connectedness that is already tying you down? My sister cried to me this evening telling me how this was not the life she envisioned when she met her husband. Is it ever? Did my mom, my dad, my other siblings, anyone, ever get the life they envisioned? No, because the only thing you can control is yourself, but they placed their destiny in someone else's hands. And, no surprise here, were disappointed. Sure, a lot of joy was created through those relationships, but can't we create joy by ourselves? I envision a life where I make the choice every day where I am and who I'm around. I don't want to be tied to someone legally or really even emotionally. I'm scared of disappointment and rather than facing it, I am hoping to create a life where you don't ever have to face it, but can still be happy. If your friends disappoint you, you get new friends, but if your family disappoints you, what then? Anyone out there in cyberspace who has stumbled across this post, please advise. *Sigh* this is therapeutic!